For everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven:

Can you remember a time when you experienced an imminent death?  Remember the uncertainty and sorrow you felt at the loss soon to occur?  Maybe it was a time when a loved one only had a matter of days or hours of life here left to live.   You could feel deep inside you the dread of the coming loss.  Maybe you have gone into battle and wondered if you would survive.  You were scared and fearful of what might happen and then when you did experience loss it was of a buddy who just seconds before was alive standing right next to you.

On June 30, 1863 near a town called Gettysburg in the state of Pennsylvania, many people were probably feeling this same dread.  On this date the Confederate Army, under the command of Robert E. Lee, was marching upon Gettysburg from the north and the west.  At the same time, the Union Army, under the leadership of George G, Meade, was marching north.  Both sides knew it was not going to be long until the shooting began. I am sure most men, as all soldiers do before they go into battle, were fearful that this would be their earthly end.

Much like is was 154 years ago today at Gettysburg there will be a death tonight on the outskirts west of town. At the stroke of the midnight the Lutheran Theological Seminary at Gettysburg (LTSG) will be no more.  For all intents and purposes it will die.  This grand and glorious institution that has trained women and men to become pastors, chaplains, deacons, and other leaders of the Lutheran, and other faith traditions, will be no more.  After 191 years of dedicated service, the signs stating “The Lutheran Theological Seminary at Gettysburg” will come down.  There will be a death and it will affect many.

Since I first heard the news of the coming death of my alma mater I have felt at least three of Elisabeth Kubler-Ross’ “Five Stages of Grief”; denial, anger, and depression.  It is indeed a sad day for me, one that I have dreaded.  The sadness is compounded in the simple fact that many of my close friends and colleagues will lose their jobs tonight.

While there will still be a seminary that sits in the same location in Gettysburg the name will be different, the curriculum will be different, and there will be many other changes coming.  I am not saying change was not necessary.  To continue as things were was not feasible.  The Lutheran Theological Seminary at Philadelphia (LTSP) and LTSG are combining to become the United Lutheran Seminary with campuses at both former locations.

I write this today because I want folks to know that the grief I, and many of my fellow graduates, feel is real and it hurts.  I have learned, both in my pastoral care classes at LTSG and while serving a year-long residency of Clinical Pastoral Education at the VA Healthcare System in Pittsburgh, that we as humans must give ourselves time to grieve.  I also learned that as clergy I should not push those with whom I am ministering with to try to get over their grief.

No, I have learned that grieving can take a while and perhaps is a life long process.  Quite simply put, Jesus grieved over the loss of those he loved and he did not get over that grief in one day.

So I will grieve in my way, I will visit my alma mater and view her from the various locations on the battlefield as I did when I lived there in community.  I will walk the surrounding battlefield and remember my four years there.  I will cherish my memories of the people I met who have now become good friends.  I have those to help me in my grieving process.  I also have my faith.  Faith that God has a plan and I cannot see what it is yet.  However this is grieving time.

While I am not ready to jump on the ULS bandwagon yet I am not saying that day may not happen in the future but as the Old Testament book of Ecclesiastes states there is a time for everything.  I take great comfort in this fact.

The title of this blog post comes from Ecclesiastes 3:1.  For me today is a time to mourn and that is perfectly fine, no matter how long it takes.

Thank you Lutheran Theological Seminary at Gettysburg, I will never forget you.

 

Calm Before The ?

I was walking on the ridge this evening, Seminary Ridge that is, here in Gettysburg.  As I looked to the west I could see dark clouds gathering and if was any warmer today I would have thought a thunderstorm was coming in.  However, the weather man, or weather woman is only calling for rain for the next several days.  I could smell the rain in the air and the animals, squirrels and birds, seemed to know it was coming too.

As I remembered back upon my reading of the battle that happened here in July 1863, I recall that rain fell upon the soldiers that fought here on July 4th.  If they were Confederate, who were leaving Pennsylvania after their failed attempt to invade the north, their mood was one of sorrow and defeat.  If they were  Union, who were cautiously making sure the Confederates were indeed leaving, their mood was one of triumph as they had stopped the Confederate advance.  Many men lie in the fields surrounding the town, either dead, or dying and their agony was multiplied by getting soaked as they were unable to move to shelter.

I cannot walk these fields without imagining what this place looked like those almost 150 years ago and how it must have differed from the tranquil scene that one sees today.  These are the days of remembrance for me.  I think of the coming summer when Gettysburg will be the scene of remembrance of this great battle.  Hundreds of thousands of visitors are expected but on this day, on this ridge, I am alone.  Alone with my thoughts, of war and its aftermath and how this place was transformed these 150 years ago.

While war is never, ever the answer to anything, it is a fact of life in this broken world.  War is destruction and death.  War is grief and sorrow.  War is not pretty.  However, remembering this place and what happened here is important if we as a society learn something from the remembering.

As the dark clouds gather, and the people come, let us never forget the words of Abraham Lincoln, “that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain—that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom—and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.”